A Christmas Day message: Father Gary Waddington, Team Rector at St Wilfrid's Harrogate, explains why love is the greatest gift

That will have been asked in a huge number of households in the run-up to Christmas. The answers might have varied from the frivolous “a million pounds”, the ordinary “I could do with a new...” to the pleading “not socks, again!”.

All over Harrogate, desperate parents will have wondered what exactly their children want and the “grown ups” probably didn’t fare any better in the annual exercise in mind reading, lest wrath descend on Christmas Day.

Yet I wonder if we’re asking the right question?

Many years ago, a dad confided to an old priest that he felt he wasn’t a very good parent. He was well paid, and his family wanted for nothing.

He left the house before everyone was up and often returned home late when his children were already asleep. He worked hard to provide for them.

Every Christmas there was a massive pile of presents for his children which often lay discarded in seconds, like so many of the gifts he showered them with throughout the year. He felt empty; something was missing.

“Ah,” said the priest. “You cannot buy the affection of your children. Next year buy less – but give them more.”

“How?” replied the dad.

The priest smiled and replied: “Give them a really costly gift: an envelope in which you promise them three hours of your time, every week, just for them to do whatever they want with you.”

The man returned the next year transformed. “It worked,” he said. “My relationship with my kids is so much better than it’s ever been.”

“Yes,” said the priest. “Love is the greatest gift, and time is the paper in which we wrap it. It costs little, but the return on it is the greatest investment we can make.”

Perhaps there’s something there for all of us. To give and receive love, wrapped in our time and attention.

After all, God gives us what we need – not always what we want – a child in a manger, who shows us how to love and be loved.

What more could anyone want?